Who is Killing the Great Snowmen of Europe?

[Jangler]

http://www.examiner.com/examiner/x-32018-Strange--Mysterious-Facts-Examiner~y2010m1d22-The-Snowman-Killer-of-Crawley

It has all the makings of an Agatha Christie novel.

A sleepy English town gripped by unexplained attacks. Innocent victims brutally savaged in the night.

No clues lead to the culprit but it is obvious from the abominable crimes that this is no ordinary murderer.

This killer stalks snowmen. And takes their heads.

The good people of Crawley, England, have a serial killer on their hands. A killer who prowls the night and decapitates snowmen. From neighborhood to neighborhood the killer moves under cover of darkness and puts the chill on children’s winter fun.

And not just snowmen – snowomen have fallen victim to this killer as well. It appears that none of the snowpeople are safe. And their snowhomes have also suffered as these vandals destroy igloos with heartless abandon. We are saddened to report that three snowbears have also been killed.

The outraged citizens of Crawley are demanding that these crimes be stopped. After all, humans and the snowman have lived together in peace for hundreds of years.

And snowmen are the rare art form that leave no trace of the art produced, except perhaps to the eagle-eyed anthropologist who finds a bone button and two lumps of coal and puts it all together.

Obviously, the primary suspects at this point are teenage hoodlums, but what gang of hoodlums has the conviction to destroy all the snow edifices in four different neighborhoods? Surely this is a uncommon fiend aiming at something deeper than mere youthful vandalism. Snowmen are a household totem and represent the very essence of our holiday and winter spirit.

Hopefully the constabulary can bring this menace to justice though it's difficult to see what the charges would be. All the evidence will soon be melted.