What is your weirdest medical condition?

[Herbert The Love Bug]

What is the weirdest medical condition or crazy injury you have or have had?

I have these large black mounds growing on my body oozing a black puss that hurt really bad. Idk what the hell they are but don't care enough to get it checked out

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[Doyle]

Please lock this thread before someone post pics of something that I can't unsee. 

[Ja Rhule]

HIPAA

[Darth Biscuit]

Penis Gigantis

[Anybodyhome]

I suffer from a serious lack of Vitamin Poon...

[Ja Rhule]

My poo smells like roses.

[pstall]

Reading incoherent paragraphs on football forums....

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[TANTRIC-NINJA]

Intense desire to motorboat Christina Aguilera's talent.

[CarolinaNCSU]

Something about penis. 

 

Only story I have medically is breaking my arm on a golf cart. Luckily no gross stuff. 

[davos]

I actually have a good one:

 

About 10 or so years ago in HS, I had a crazy fever and cold sweat this one day. Was walking to class when I just collapsed and had the craziest ab cramp you can think of.  

 

End up in the hospital for 6 days...because....

 

Apparently I had gotten a tic bite in the mountains that developed into untreated Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever that had a domino effect....enflaming my lymph-node which then resulted in a crazy spike in my Crohn's and a subsequent kidney infection.  Or something along those lines; it was a while ago lol Didn't get any crazy rashes though so they caught it early...but not really.  

 

It was like a House episode bc the it took like 3 different types of docs to figure out what the hell was going on.  

[KSpan]

I had a case of flesh-eating bacteria as a kid. Almost had to amputate my foot.

[TANTRIC-NINJA]

Ass nipples

I have to wear Silk boxers so they do not get irrtated.

[TANTRIC-NINJA]

Reading incoherent paragraphs on football forums....

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More of a mutant power right?

[Hotsauce]

Double jointed thumbs.

I can work my way completely out of hand cuffs...

In high school I got in a fight in the school cafeteria. The school police officer put me and the other guy in hand cuffs, with our hands behind our backs. As I was standing there answering questions, I was fidgeting with them because they were so tight. I dislocated both thumbs, and the cuffs slide right off and hit the floor.

The cop looked at the ground, then back at me like, "are you effing kidding me?!?"