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jtnc

By jtnc,
in Carolina Panthers

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ItsNotGonnaBeAlright Newbie

ItsNotGonnaBeAlright

Posted
Posted

YOU! FRONT ROW! IS THAT THE NEW NOKIA WINDOWS PHONE WITH THE 44 MEGAPIXEL CAMERA? IT IS? WHAT DO YOU THINK OF IT? ITS NICE? OK, THAT SETTLES IT! I WILL HAVE TO TRY ONE! THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME! NOW IF YOU WILL EXCUSE ME I NEED TO GO GIVE ONE OF THE GENTLEMEN ACROSS THE FIELD A HUG FILLED WITH MURDER! HAVE A SAFE DRIVE HOME SIR! ALSO, YOU HAVE BEAUTIFUL CHILDREN!

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RelaxImaPro

Posted
Posted

*Luke had just laid the wood to Ravens' WR Aaron Mellette that results in an overturned interception.  He receives a flag for the hit, and immediately directs his attention towards Joe Flacco*

 

Luke:  "Oh I'm sorry, did I break your concentration?"  *Luke glances down at Mellette's body and proceeds to brush the blood off his forearm, then looks back to Flacco*  "I didn't mean to do that... please, continue... you were in the process of trying to complete a pass?"  "Oh, you were finished?  Well then, allow me to retort.  What does a completed pass look like...?"

 

*Joe Flacco, stunned, glances back and forth in a desperate attempt to find his words... stumbling over his own tongue in the process*

 

Joe: "Pass the ball..."

 

Luke: "What country you from?!"

 

Joe: "I-I p-pass the ball..."

 

Luke: "'PASS THE BALL' AIN'T NO COUNTRY I EVER HEARD OF!  THEY PLAY FOOTBALL IN 'PASS THE BALL'?!"

 

Joe: "Pass t-the ball!!!"  *sweat now beginning to feverishly drip down Flacco's unibrow*

 

Luke: "FOOTBALL MOTHER FUGGER, DO YOU PLAY IT?!?!!!"

 

Joe:  "YES!!!"

 

Luke: "THEN YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'?!?!?"

 

Joe:  "YES!!!"

 

Luke: "DESCRIBE - WHAT - A - COMPLETED - PASS - LOOKS - LIKE!!!!!"

 

*Joe, now on the verge of shitting his pants right there in the middle of the field looks as if he's about to go into cardiac arrest... a waterfall of sweat now pouring off of the unibrow*

 

Joe: "..... p-p-p-ppp-ass the ball - I?!?!"

 

*Luke, outraged, begins to pace the field back and forth and starts to bait Flacco into once again fuging around and passing the ball in his direction*

 

cYJwx.St.138.jpeg

 

 

Luke:  "PASS THE BALL AGAIN!  PASS.  THE.  BALL.  A-GAIN!  I DARE YOU!  I DOUBLE DARE YOUR MOTHER FUGGER!!!  PASS THE BALL THIS WAY ONE MO' GODDAMN TIME!!!"

 

*Flacco unwisely passes the ball again.  Luke picks it off*

 

 

 

 

GG Ravens.

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