What would you tell the eight year-old you?

[Darth Biscuit]

The list of the next 5 super bowl winners and to, in 5 years, buy as much Microsoft stock that you can with the money you won betting on super bowls and sell it all in 1999.

[Bronn]

Stop eating so much fast food.

Don't get bored in school and apply yourself to doing more even though you feel it is beneath you.

Save money and don't buy stupid stuff.

Create Facebook.

[Brokenbad]

I had a really vivid dream once where I met myself when I was five.

I met myself on the porch of my parents house.

I could tell my five year old self had no idea who I was, and looked like I was very scared of me.

[SCP]

Don't switch your college major to Marketing because your football coach didn't want lab class to interfere with spring practice, you're not going to the NFL.

When you have that drunken urge to urinate on a police car, don't do it.

Volunteer more.

[Mrs Pantherfan]

Don't smoke so much weed in high school...in turn ...you'll attend more classes and therefore give a fug about school and go to college

[Jase]

get your hand out of your pants.

[Ja Rhule]

Pull out.

[PhillyB]

this fundamentalist religious stuff you're being brought up on is actually insane

[Mr. Scot]

If a guy with a high-pitched voice and a shiny glove invites you over to his house, say no.

[Kurb]

Listen to Dr Dre, he is a scholar.

Start up a site called facebook.

Challenge yourself.

Fug bitches errrryyyday

[Proudiddy]

Don't buy stocks... Instead, have unprotected sex with every girl who wants to "talk to you." They don't want to fall in love and date you. They want your magic stick. Give it to them.

You'll be on the verge of a threesome at 16 with two hot girls rubbing and licking on your six-pack in a bed. Your friend will be angry and cockblock you... Don't take him with you.

You'll still meet your wife and have a wonderful life, you'll just have had a lot more sex. You're welcome. /farts into millions of tiny particles

[TylerVagyler]

Start kicking field goals so you can get a free ride in college.

[Proudiddy]

And another thing...

If you ever have a problem with a peer, don't listen to your parents... PUNCH THAT MF'ER IN THE THROAT. Get in as many physical altercations as you can before high school... Then it's still fun and you don't go to jail for it.

[Mr. Scot]

That whole thing they keep telling you about your permanent record from school affecting you for the rest of your life...

Yeah, it's crap.