So I Just Got An Inbox Message From An Ex Gf...

[KaseKlosed]

SHES HORMONAL IGNORE IT

[Ivan The Awesome]

She went in today, getting results by next week. I haven't paid a dime. This is great...Apparently the dude she's with wants to know too. Also, he didn't know that her and I were still getting it on after they fooled around behind my back.. How fuged up is this man?! Some chicks shouldn't pro-create. Regardless of this kid being mine or not, I'm going to feel bad for the child. This chick is nuts.. =/

[davos]

well damn...I feel ya there Ivo...there are def nutsos that can come outta nowhere. It takes patience, but she'll fade away into the eerie abyss

[sunbunny]

Unless it comes back he's the father, I'd still have a test done before getting all excited about father's day. You don't know who else she might have been with. Oh, and I'd want proof that test came back exclusive, not just her word.

Man, that other guy is forking over some cash for those tests while she's still pregnant.

[Ivan The Awesome]

"Ivan, I know I've not been the best woman for you, I've done some really fuged up things, to you. I've changed. I can't express how much I miss you and still love you. I will start with this. This baby isn't yours. If I didn't care about you i wouldn't tell you, I would have just played you and made you take care of of him/her. If you can see it in your heart to give me another chance I swear we will be the happiest couple ever. I hope you think about it. I miss you, love you.

Erin"

Ok, I'm getting drunk tonight. If y'all were here I'd buy drinks for everyone. fug YES! I'M NOT STUCK WITH A CHEATING BITCH!

How should I go by and reply my disinterest in her offer? Should I be full on dick or just let her down easy? I'm on top of the world right now!! fug YEAH PIE FOR EVERYONE!

[Skew]

Send her the following email:

"Who are you again?"

[Ivan The Awesome]

Was thinking of putting this in the email.

[Crixtala]

being a dickbag would be fun

just remember, super prego chicks can be fuging INSANE

[Ivan The Awesome]

I have a conscious though. I wouldn't want anything I say or do directly affect that baby, even though it's NOT mine. I wouldn't want her to go all ape poo and throw herself down the stairs, ya dig?

[Wyank]

Please don't email her drunk tonight.

[Wyank]

Going full on dick would suggest there is still strong emotion towards her. Letting her down easy would mean you're over what she did to you. It's no big deal to you anymore. You appreciate she's interested but you already know you would be happier alone than with her. You're the better man. Not hurt. Not pissed. Walking away ready to tag the next hot chick willing to spread.

[Ja Rhule]

send her this video in e-mail ;)

[SmootsDaddy89]

Your name really is Ivan?

That fuging rules.

[Ja Rhule]

Ivan... don't be that guy...