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I had to grin a little bit when my wife was talking today.


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She said that men and women are so different when it comes to having philosophical discussions (and, yes, she said all points of contention come down to differences in philosophy). She said that she has learned to stop trying to debate with me (and other men) about philosophy, because when she loses, she loses, and when she wins she loses, so it's all pretty useless. She said that women actually like to actually listen and discuss things out, while men (for the most part) just look at discussions as a competition to be won at all costs, and that endless debating just gives men another reason to beat our chests.

You know that the Huddle flashed in my brain before she even got the whole sentence out.:D

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Actually she is right on, much to my chagrin. Many here take every counter argument or difference of opinion as a personal affront and an argument to be won. There is a desire to beat the other not find common ground. I find myself pulled into those kind of arguments way too often.

When it is an issue that people feel strogly about like politics or religion it gets even uglier.

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I love taking a Devil's advocate approach to a debate, so a lot of times, I'll disagree with someone's views to find out more about them. I could care less on the stance I'm taking a lot of times, the really interesting part is where you get to tinker around with someone's head and learn their stance and how far they'll go to support it.

The funny part about your wife's thought is that she's the one who introduces winners and losers into a discussion. Not you, the male, but her the female. To me, that speaks volumes in that she feels she is losing at anything, rather than coming to an understanding of where each person stands on an issue. If, as she says, men are the ones who feel the need to win, why is it she feels she loses? Hmm?

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I love taking a Devil's advocate approach to a debate, so a lot of times, I'll disagree with someone's views to find out more about them. I could care less on the stance I'm taking a lot of times, the really interesting part is where you get to tinker around with someone's head and learn their stance and how far they'll go to support it.

The funny part about your wife's thought is that she's the one who introduces winners and losers into a discussion. Not you, the male, but her the female. To me, that speaks volumes in that she feels she is losing at anything, rather than coming to an understanding of where each person stands on an issue. If, as she says, men are the ones who feel the need to win, why is it she feels she loses? Hmm?

Well, Raskle, sometimes I do tend to let the testosterone rear it's ugly head via my rantings...so, uh...I'm thinking that she doesn't like the delivery.:blush5: Let me give you an example:

:confused:.:rolleyes:.:mad:.:banghead:

:incazzato:.:cuss:.:banghead:

Yes, I am guilty at times, but so are all of us. You know that this does really go on in the huddle a lot. I could be wrong, but anecdotal evidence suggests to me from observing the women on this board, that there is probably a kernel of truth in what my wife is saying. Most (not all) of the women don't go on and on in the threads going back and forth, they just let there opinions be known and move on. No diatribes or histrionics.

By the way, playing the devil's advocate is not above my M.O. as well...

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She said that men and women are so different when it comes to having philosophical discussions (and, yes, she said all points of contention come down to differences in philosophy). She said that she has learned to stop trying to debate with me (and other men) about philosophy, because when she loses, she loses, and when she wins she loses, so it's all pretty useless. She said that women actually like to actually listen and discuss things out, while men (for the most part) just look at discussions as a competition to be won at all costs, and that endless debating just gives men another reason to beat our chests.

You know that the Huddle flashed in my brain before she even got the whole sentence out.:D

My wife is always saying I'm on the huddle way too much...she's probably right but like I care. Anyways, I told her one time that instead of always gripping about me being on here that she should also join as she is also a Panthers fan. She went to the site and looked up all of my post and things like that. She thought the info was okay but could not understand why everyone types replies. Her exact statement was "That guys already thinks he's right. Why bother arguing?"

She realized this in a couple of seconds and after reading just one of my replies. It took me a 4 page thread over the span of two days to realize the same thing.

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It's one thing to have a civil debate, but it's another thing to call names, be patronizing and sarcastic, and personally attack other people because of a difference in beliefs.

My wife would tell you that screaming and/or "raising one's voice" is also counterproductive.

Of course, passion can also be a good thing as far as I am concerned.

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