Best man one liners

[pantherfan49]

Wedding tomorrow at 5. Let's hear some good one liners.

[Chimera]

You, being a best man, need one liners?

Or you need one liners directed at the best man?

[pantherfan49]

You, being a best man, need one liners?

Or you need one liners directed at the best man?

I am the best man

[pstall]

"to our wives and girlfriends....may they never meet"

[Kevin Greene]

"Your new wife, best piece of ass I ever had. Cheers!"

[pstall]

just get a pulse of the crowd and speak from the heart. that trumps cliches all day long.

[Chimera]

"Your new wife, best piece of ass I ever had. Cheers!"

too cliche

and probably too much truth. :D

Marriage is a mutual relationship if both parties know when to be mute.

(Groom's name) is living proof that (bride's name) can take a joke.

Easy on the throttle, steady on the gears, roll her over gently and she'll last for many years.

[Chimera]

I forgot the most obvious one... "If I'm the best man, why are you honeymooning with HIM?"

[o_O]

"I went home with the bride once a bunch of times."

[Miaoww]

just get a pulse of the crowd and speak from the heart. that trumps cliches all day long.

That's what I did - kept it short, sweet and sentimental. Didn't want to start telling lurid stories or cracking risque jokes with his grandparents in the front row and her mother next to me.

[Anybodyhome]

Unless you're an accomplished stand-up comedian with impeccable timing and can deliver a joke or story- don't even try.

I know it may sound fun and you could gain the spotlight for a few minutes, but it can ultimately be more embarrassing for you if you try to suddenly be someone you're not.

[pantherfan49]

just get a pulse of the crowd and speak from the heart. that trumps cliches all day long.

Sounds good except that I don't really have a heart.

[Brokenbad]

"My wife likes to talk after sex, thats why she called me from Vegas." (Dangerfield)

"I was sober for thirteen years, then I turned fourteen." (Movie)

"I am coming up on my seventeenth anniversary. Can you believe I have been having sex with the same woman for seventeen years? If my wife found out she would kill me!"

[chknwing]

"You cant be my only one but you can be my favorite one" wait nah that wont work.