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Relationship/jealousy question

Zcustom

By Zcustom,
in Huddle Lounge

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Kurb Newbie

Kurb

Posted
Posted

Would you want him to talk to you if the roles were reversed ?

Thats the first question.

He probably feels trapped because they have been together so long.

Fat chicks aren't worth headaches like that.

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Hawk Newbie

Hawk

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I was going to offer to bang her so that he'd always be able to use that against her, but you lost me at fat...unless you're willing to pay a premium there!!!

seriously, be very careful with this one. Years ago, my best friend was in a similar situation and I had it from a very reliable source that she was cheating on him. I confronted him about it and he talked to her about it and at the end of the day, she made him choose between her and I. Needless to say, I lost out. We had been best friends since grade school. We never spoke again until about two years ago when he called me to tell me he had terminal cancer. We did get together and we tried to make up for lost time, but it obviously wasnt the same.

point being...getting between friends and women rarely works out well.

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Kettle Newbie

Kettle

Posted
Posted

I was going to offer to bang her so that he'd always be able to use that against her, but you lost me at fat...unless you're willing to pay a premium there!!!

seriously, be very careful with this one. Years ago, my best friend was in a similar situation and I had it from a very reliable source that she was cheating on him. I confronted him about it and he talked to her about it and at the end of the day, she made him choose between her and I. Needless to say, I lost out. We had been best friends since grade school. We never spoke again until about two years ago when he called me to tell me he had terminal cancer. We did get together and we tried to make up for lost time, but it obviously wasnt the same.

point being...getting between friends and women rarely works out well.

from my experience...even if you are related

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Delhommey Newbie

Delhommey

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Stay out. He won't listen to you.

Worst case scenario is he completely alienates you, best case is you getting to say "I told you so" in a few years.

If he honestly asks you, you can tell him tactfully. If he doesn't ask you, say nothing.

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theyhateme45 Newbie

theyhateme45

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Like others said, at the end of the day he has to do what will make him happy.

If he tells you he feels trapped then you can let him know he is not trapped. We have a limited time here on Earth, and you only get one chance at it so why live it for someone else or being miserable. He has to be selfish and live life for himself and what he wants...

If that's not what he wants he's only going to waste years of his life being miserable until he cannot take it anymore.

I believe people get trapped in relationships because of the time they put in, or because the other is generally a good person. Well if your annoyed on the inside now, you will be even more annoyed years down the road if both people are not working together to make each other and themselves happy. This is why the divorce rate is so high in the US now. People do not want to be honest with themselves. Before you go to marriage honestly look at that person and say will be happy for the next 50+ years of my life with this person and will I truly enjoy life. If you cannot answer yes then you probably need to go another direction and save both you and your other from wasting time and more pain that could have been avoided if you were just honest with yourself.

IF he ask, you can tell him.... But some people have to learn something’s the hard way in life before they realize. Sometimes outside help will never do any good until they realize what's true, real, and important for themselves.

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Kettle Newbie

Kettle

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it sounds like the guy just needs something to boost his self confidence enough to leave the girl. i was lucky enough to have something like that happen just after high school, and luckily didn't end up like my lil bro.

it didn't take much really. a night out with the guys. some smoke and alcohol to loosen me up. a pretty girl talking to me, and giving me her number. the next day i broke up with the psycho from high school.

you can try and help something like this happen the way my friends did for me, or you can leave it be and let the man's life run its course. sitting him down for a talk likely won't help matters though. you gotta make your points while the guy is having the time of his life.

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pstall Newbie

pstall

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Posted

i mean as a friend we can say something, thats what friends do. to a point of course. it depends on how well i know someone. i have a great core of friends i have known since elem. those guys are like brothers so if something is going down we don't shy away from telling the other like it is. but we also know, despite what might be said, it's the others call and its on them.

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