Huddle Celebrity Roast thread: Saltman

[Matt Foley]

Ladies and gentleman, welcome to our first Huddle celebrity roast thread. Our guest of dishonor has declared jihad on our senses with his posts. Although he just surpassed 1,000 in rep, his jokes have turned the Huddle into Ground Zero. We will give him the final word, but before then, have at him. Who shall be first among us to throw stones?

[dimbee]

If there's one thing ol' Saltman knows about it, it's roasting... Jews, Zionists and Crusaders- the lot. Roasting? Gah, I bet the twig and berries get roasting in those full-length robes out in those deserts! There's nothing like roasting marshmallows over I.E.D. fires!! It's funny- Saltman married the first woman he saw when he left his terrorist cell for good. His words, "You are the fairest skinned woman I have ever beheld." Which, technically is true, since back home, women aren't allowed to show their skin!!

[88 Bronco]

Some people say he's a good guy, but I don't trust anyone who won't eat bacon. His little book of Islam says kill the infidels but don't have a ham sammich. fug that stupidity. Then there's his homosexuality. If he had as many pricks sticking out of him as he's had in him, he'd look like a Allah damned porcupine. The only reason he likes turd cutters so much is because he can tag his wife and pretend that her obnoxiously droopy vagina is a pair of balls.

[lightsout]

Allow me to start by extending a "hello, how are you all doing?" in Saltman's native tongue "ali di jihad, clon durka durka?" Really, though, Saltman. How was the 9/11 celebration at your place? Did you set up a game of Jenga, then set it on fire? Or was it the Game of Life, just so you can set up IEDs on all the "Pay Day" spots? You know, the more rep you have, the smaller your penis. Which, I guess it doesn't matter. The Saltman is so salty that he dissolves after every blowjob!

[Matt Foley]

LOL. Saltman is going to kill me. At least he'll take himself out in the process. Ba dum psh!

[lightsout]

LOL. Saltman is going to kill me. At least he'll take himself out in the process. Ba dum psh!

Hey, it's an honor both being a roaster and being the roasted. I'm sure he will take it as such. He may actually gloat about it. Meat, you may have created a monster.

[The Saltman]

I'm honored.

[lightsout]

I'm honored.

You've earned it, big guy! :thumbsup:

[Matt Foley]

Did Salman Rushdie make it?

[The Saltman]

Stop ruining it meat.

[88 Bronco]

I'm honored.

Is that terrorist for I want to car bomb your schools?

[88 Bronco]

Stop ruining it meat.

Allah damned, you have never said that before.

[The Saltman]

Is that terrorist for I want to car bomb your schools?

No. Only your mobile home.

[Future of the Funchise]