Any ideas?

[Epistaxis]

That's the really smart part about his annoying destruction.

He always bypasses the leather sofa on the hardwood and goes right to the one fabric item in the one carpeted area we have to do his bad things.

He knows.

And when I took him out of his timeout, he looks at the stain and goes "daddy...that....just....happened".

[Jangler]

Piss on it, nobody will notice the Pam then.

[Matt Foley]

Call him Sofa King the rest of his life. When he gets older and asks why, say "because you were sofa king dead until your mother stopped me from killing you."

[Scrumtrilescent]

.003/10

[theedaddy]

grab the kids head so atleast one finger is over each eye, grip and push their face in it and scream "NO" very loud over and over.

[Epistaxis]

Update:

Palmolive scrubbed in to stain+hot water spray+shop vac suction= no more stain

It took a long time, but it was almost therapeutic.

[Future of the Funchise]

Congrats... Still think you should beat the kid tho.

They're never to young for you to set an example.

Spare the rod, Spoil the child, Destroy the nation.

[Carolina Husker]

I did that with maple syrup across the entire living room and entertainment center when I was 4.

[Captroop]

I set the couch on fire to scare away the chicken heart while I was listening to the radio. Then I covered the floor with jello so it would slip if it came after me.

Let's see who gets the reference

[Future of the Funchise]

I set the couch on fire to scare away the chicken heart while I was listening to the radio. Then I covered the floor with jello so it would slip if it came after me.

Let's see who gets the reference

dammit i'm out of pie

[pstall]

Agreed.

And throw out the couch too.

Invite some West Virginia football fans over. :driving: