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Panthers Tankathon (Week 6 Edition)


Leeroy Jenkins Ph.D.
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We need both a Micah Parsons type and a Fred Warner type. Burns wasn't it, so that trade was still good. Defense is sucking because of Brown out and no playable linebackers. Need to make rebuilding the front 7 a priority next offseason. Dalton is fine starting another year or two until 2026 draft

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23 hours ago, Leeroy Jenkins Ph.D. said:

The Panthers are currently in line to receive the 6th pick of the draft. Current draft order:

1 New England 1-4 (SOS .434)

2 Cincinnati 1-4 (SOS .488)

3 Cleveland 1-4 (SOS .506)

4 LA Rams 1-4 (SOS .506)

5 Jacksonville 1-4 (SOS .506)

6 Carolina 1-4 (SOS .542)

7 Tennessee 1-3 (SOS.518)

Due to the Panthers having the highest SOS in the league, we currently lose the tie-breaker for draft position against every other 1 win team in the league. Obviously, these are the teams we need to pull for. We also need to lower our current SOS by having teams we have played and will play against lose. Here is who you should cheer for, in week 6, in order of importance, for lowering the Panthers draft pick. There are 9 games this week that will Directly affect out draft status. The team that needs to win is in bold

1. Atlanta vs Carolina
2. Houston vs New England
3. Cleveland vs Philadelphia
4. Jacksonville vs Chicago
5. Indianapolis vs Tennessee
6. Arizona vs Green bay
7. Washington vs Baltimore
8. Pittsburgh vs Las Vegas
9. Detroit vs Dallas

 

I knew this kind of post would come out sooner or later.  Before I complete my post I just want everybody to understand. I want watch best for this team. I am a Panthers fan. That being said I am also 62 years old and I have been watching pro football since the early 70s. And I can honestly say that the idea of taking your team AKA purposely losing so that you can out lose lower teams to get that first round draft pick so you can get that shiny new quarterback. 

If I am not mistaken, didn’t we already make that mistake and we ended up with Bryce Young?  Why do we want to make this mistake again?

What about the fans who pay hard earned money to watch or attend the games?  Do you think they want to see their team purposely lose or not give their best performance?

The idea of a team tanking did not even exist prior to approximately 2010.  I do not understand why people think that the first draft pick equals the next Patrick Mahomes?.

it is my opinion that the NFL needs to get involved in this, they need to figure out a fairway to run the draft without giving teams the incentive to purposely lose games for that first draft pick.

By the way, I posted the following earlier last year.  People thought that this post was not funny and was stupid. 
 

But that was exactly my point.

posted this already in a tread. I just wanted to share with everyone. I apologize in advance if it is not good. This is what a typical game may sound like if both sides attempt to Tank…


Announcer one - “we have kick off.” The ball goes into the end zone and will come out at the 20 yard line. Announcer number two - “it looks like the Saints are bringing in a new quarterback”. #2 - #1 “I don’t recognize the quarterback do you, Jim?” #1-“I haven’t seen this person before Tom.” #2-“it looks like their public relations man in a saints uniform.”

#1-“ first down and 10 yards to go from the 20. #2-“ the quarterback is Marion orange, he is the public relations guy for the Saints”. #1-“ Marion, Takes the snap and he’s running…. In the wrong direction.” #2-“ well… he has plenty of room to run and I don’t think he has to worry about any Tackle”. 

#1-“ Marion has made it to his own endzone. All the Panthers need to do is tackle him and they will have a two point safety.” #2-“ that is correct Tom, however… it looks like the Panthers are trying to drag Miriam out of the end zone into the field of play.” #1-“ the officials blow this play dead. The Carolina Panthers have just scored a safety.” #2-“The panthers will also get the ball on the free kick.” #1-we will return after a word from our sponsors “.

#1-“And we are back. We have just witnessed one of the weirdest drives in NFL history. Saints quarterback, Marion orange just ran the ball back and scored a safety for the other team.” #2-“ back to receive the kick is um … who is that Tom?” #1-“ I don’t know Jim. I’ve never seen this guy before in my life. I also noticed that his uniform is a little bit too big for his body.“. #1-“ the Saints kick off and uh the unknown panther lets the ball drop, and nobody seems to want to jump on the ball. The ball is blown dead.” 

#1-“ the Panthers will have the ball on their own 37 yard line. Looks like they also have a new quarterback.” #1-“ this is one of the weirdest football games I have announced Tom do you have any idea who that guy is?” #2-“ no but his uniform is way too tight. I don’t see how he can move.” 

#1-“ the unknown, Panthers quarterback, takes the snap and wow! He is immediately dropped by cam Jordan for a huge loss. “ #2-“ if I didn’t know any better Tom, I would say that the quarterback was trying to run the other way, but cam Jordan caught up with him too fast.” #1-“ah it looks like the Panthers are celebrating in that huge 17 yard loss.” #2-“ my sources have confirmed that the new quarterback for the Panthers is the equipment manager, TJ Duncan”.

(both announcers, forget to mute the .microphone, and they are heard chitchat thing in the background). #2-“ oh I get it! I get it. I bet both of them are trying to tank for a high draft pick “. #1-“ well,, if that is the case, the Panthers have a huge two point lead to overcome!”

(both announcers discovered the microphone has never been muted. They are over come by embarrassment, announcer 2 asks announcer 1. if he still has that flask of Jack Daniels in his pocket.). 

#1-“ it is first down and 27 to go from the Panthers 10 yard line” #2-“ Saints call their first time out, .,,, It looks like the coaches in the sideline or walking off the field.” #1-“For whatever reason, the Saints have decided to forfeit this game.”

#2-“ the panther sideline is running after the Saints sidelines they are dragging each other back to the field.” #1-“uh oh!! it looks like fighting has broken out. We will return after this message. Any word from our sponsor?” #2-“ I think we better clarify that we will try to return after these messages any word from our sponsor.”

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Just now, Green-Ghost said:

I knew this kind of post would come out sooner or later.  Before I complete my post I just want everybody to understand. I want watch best for this team. I am a Panthers fan. That being said I am also 62 years old and I have been watching pro football since the early 70s. And I can honestly say that the idea of taking your team AKA purposely losing so that you can out lose lower teams to get that first round draft pick so you can get that shiny new quarterback. 

If I am not mistaken, didn’t we already make that mistake and we ended up with Bryce Young?  Why do we want to make this mistake again?

What about the fans who pay hard earned money to watch or attend the games?  Do you think they want to see their team purposely lose or not give their best performance?

The idea of a team tanking did not even exist prior to approximately 2010.  I do not understand why people think that the first draft pick equals the next Patrick Mahomes?.

it is my opinion that the NFL needs to get involved in this, they need to figure out a fairway to run the draft without giving teams the incentive to purposely lose games for that first draft pick.

By the way, I posted the following earlier last year.  People thought that this post was not funny and was stupid. 
 

But that was exactly my point.

posted this already in a tread. I just wanted to share with everyone. I apologize in advance if it is not good. This is what a typical game may sound like if both sides attempt to Tank…


Announcer one - “we have kick off.” The ball goes into the end zone and will come out at the 20 yard line. Announcer number two - “it looks like the Saints are bringing in a new quarterback”. #2 - #1 “I don’t recognize the quarterback do you, Jim?” #1-“I haven’t seen this person before Tom.” #2-“it looks like their public relations man in a saints uniform.”

#1-“ first down and 10 yards to go from the 20. #2-“ the quarterback is Marion orange, he is the public relations guy for the Saints”. #1-“ Marion, Takes the snap and he’s running…. In the wrong direction.” #2-“ well… he has plenty of room to run and I don’t think he has to worry about any Tackle”. 

#1-“ Marion has made it to his own endzone. All the Panthers need to do is tackle him and they will have a two point safety.” #2-“ that is correct Tom, however… it looks like the Panthers are trying to drag Miriam out of the end zone into the field of play.” #1-“ the officials blow this play dead. The Carolina Panthers have just scored a safety.” #2-“The panthers will also get the ball on the free kick.” #1-we will return after a word from our sponsors “.

#1-“And we are back. We have just witnessed one of the weirdest drives in NFL history. Saints quarterback, Marion orange just ran the ball back and scored a safety for the other team.” #2-“ back to receive the kick is um … who is that Tom?” #1-“ I don’t know Jim. I’ve never seen this guy before in my life. I also noticed that his uniform is a little bit too big for his body.“. #1-“ the Saints kick off and uh the unknown panther lets the ball drop, and nobody seems to want to jump on the ball. The ball is blown dead.” 

#1-“ the Panthers will have the ball on their own 37 yard line. Looks like they also have a new quarterback.” #1-“ this is one of the weirdest football games I have announced Tom do you have any idea who that guy is?” #2-“ no but his uniform is way too tight. I don’t see how he can move.” 

#1-“ the unknown, Panthers quarterback, takes the snap and wow! He is immediately dropped by cam Jordan for a huge loss. “ #2-“ if I didn’t know any better Tom, I would say that the quarterback was trying to run the other way, but cam Jordan caught up with him too fast.” #1-“ah it looks like the Panthers are celebrating in that huge 17 yard loss.” #2-“ my sources have confirmed that the new quarterback for the Panthers is the equipment manager, TJ Duncan”.

(both announcers, forget to mute the .microphone, and they are heard chitchat thing in the background). #2-“ oh I get it! I get it. I bet both of them are trying to tank for a high draft pick “. #1-“ well,, if that is the case, the Panthers have a huge two point lead to overcome!”

(both announcers discovered the microphone has never been muted. They are over come by embarrassment, announcer 2 asks announcer 1. if he still has that flask of Jack Daniels in his pocket.). 

#1-“ it is first down and 27 to go from the Panthers 10 yard line” #2-“ Saints call their first time out, .,,, It looks like the coaches in the sideline or walking off the field.” #1-“For whatever reason, the Saints have decided to forfeit this game.”

#2-“ the panther sideline is running after the Saints sidelines they are dragging each other back to the field.” #1-“uh oh!! it looks like fighting has broken out. We will return after this message. Any word from our sponsor?” #2-“ I think we better clarify that we will try to return after these messages any word from our sponsor.”

By the way, I apologize for my stupid spellcheck on the phone

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20 hours ago, VintagePanther said:

Yeah ima cheer for Atlanta on Sunday man yall goofy as hell . Get out of that fantasy mind set . Yall wanna tank tank tank . Wake up we just had the number one overall pick and botched it ! 

I am with you 100 hundred percent.  I do not think the Atlanta Falcons or as good as the announcer would like them to be. I want the Panthers to absolutely destroy Atlanta!

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Look, let me be clear. I want the Panthers to win out, make the playoffs, etc.  

However, with that seemingly years away, at least knowing that something positive can possibly come from all these loses gives me some kind of solace and a reason to stay interested in football. It's like hedging your bet. Panthers win, that's a win. Panthers lose, at least I don't have to sink into depression.

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14 minutes ago, Leeroy Jenkins Ph.D. said:

Look, let me be clear. I want the Panthers to win out, make the playoffs, etc.  

However, with that seemingly years away, at least knowing that something positive can possibly come from all these loses gives me some kind of solace and a reason to stay interested in football. It's like hedging your bet. Panthers win, that's a win. Panthers lose, at least I don't have to sink into depression.

The thing that has to happen is for us to start drafting well. It's very hard to complete a turnaround through almost only free agency. Also very, very expensive.

If that doesn't start improving, there is really no light at the end of this tunnel.

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