Jump to content

  • Welcome!

    Register and log in easily with Twitter or Google accounts!

    Or simply create a new Huddle account. 

    Members receive fewer ads , access our dark theme, and the ability to join the discussion!

     

Why Your Team Sucks 2024: Carolina Panthers

hepcat

By hepcat,
in Carolina Panthers

 Share

Recommended Posts

hepcat Grand Master

hepcat

Posted
Posted

https://defector.com/why-your-team-sucks-2024-carolina-panthers

Usually these things are supposed to be hyperbole but in the case of the Panthers...I don't think it is. 

Quote

Your 2023 record: 2-15. Under other circumstances, going 2-15 with a new coach and a rookie quarterback is a relatively normal occurrence. The new guys eat poo for a year, get the hang of things in Year 2, and then HEY NOW, by Year 3 their championship window is officially open. A proven formula, if you’re not the Jets.

Carolina’s only victories last season came against the Texans (how?!) and a 9-7 “win” against the Falcons that featured 487 yards of combined offense. Their new free-agent workhorse back amassed 432 yards rushing. They only had one receiver catch over 50 passes. And, as a crowning insult, they lost to the Bears, all but handing Chicago the No. 1 overall pick in the process. Everyone got fired. Again. Fans lost all hope. Again. And the owner filled his diaper with a thick, viscous, green stool. Again.

 

Your coach: Honestly, does it even fuging matter? Regardless of whoever gets to hold the title of “head coach” in this organization, they still have to dance whenever this man fires his six-shooter at their feet:

Days before Thanksgiving, with the team spiraling and Young getting pummeled, Tepper told Reich to fix the rookie’s footwork. Fitterer and others had told Tepper that Young’s feet were the cause of some of the Panthers’ protection issues. They believed Young wasn’t dropping back deep enough on his pass sets… Tepper’s instruction about Young’s footwork came after weekly conversations between Tepper and Reich on Young’s development and early struggles.

Quote

Your quarterback: Lollipop Guild member Bryce Young, who cost the Panthers two first-rounders (one of which became Caleb Williams), two second-rounders, and WR DJ Moore. Young cleared 200 yards passing only five times, and 300 only once. He was sacked 62 times, second in the league only behind Sam Howell. PFF currently has him as their 35th ranked QB across the entire NFL, below the likes of Kenny Pickett, Aidan O’Connell, Tommy DeVito, and Zach Wilson. Every analytics tool spits out a 404 error when you ask it to evaluate this poor shrimp:

Here is where I note that the Panthers drafted Young over C.J. Stroud, who would go on to make the Houston Texans into a Super Bowl threat after just one year on the job. That could have been you, Carolina, but it’s not. The Houston Texans, of all teams, got one over on you. You know how Jags fans still lament drafting a punter instead of Russell Wilson? OK, well imagine multiplying that buyer’s remorse by a factor of 9,000. That’s the kind of long-term ruin we’re talking about here.

Quote

What’s new that sucks: You’d think this roster couldn’t get any worse, but GUESS WHAT fugOS? It’s worse. That fourth-ranked D from last year just lost its best player in edge rusher Brian Burns, whom Carolina traded to the Giants for a second-rounder plus a side of coleslaw. Carolina could’ve gotten two firsts for Burns had they taken the Rams up on a fat trade offer for him last offseason. But why extract maximum trade value from a disgruntled player when you can keep him around and break his will instead? What, you think David Tepper prefers winning to making people’s lives miserable? History shows otherwise.

Quote

What has always sucked: Near-retirement Adam Thielen is still the best skill position player on this roster, and boy is he happy to be here!

“I think they’re behind a little bit as far as facilities,” Thielen said, speaking over Zoom video call Monday during a media event for the American Century Championship, a celebrity golf tournament he’ll participate in next month. “We probably have the worst facilities in the NFL right now, and I don’t think there is anybody who would argue that.”

 

There isn’t. This is the worst franchise in the NFL. Jets fans look down on Panthers fans, and are right to. I’d rather get myself off with a lit stick of dynamite than watch this glorified UFL outfit. 

And my favorite quote:

Quote

Relocate them to the bottom of the fuging ocean.

Welp have fun y'all!

  • Beer 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
JawnyBlaze Grand Master

JawnyBlaze

Posted
Posted

Well, one section was easily false. We didn’t lose our best player, we extended him. And the defense looks better on paper, not worse.  The only player we lost and didn’t replace with at least an equivalent was Luvu.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
 Share
Go to topic listing

  • PMH4OWPW7JD2TDGWZKTOYL2T3E.jpg

  • Topics

  • Posts

    • strato
      Gameday Thread: KC-CAR

      By strato · Posted

      He made some excellent throws but he always has made some excellent throws here and there. I don't know what to think, which is what I was apprehensive about. Is he going to have a decent downfield game? Because okay Legette dropped one, but someone was giving stats prior to the bye or during it where he had two downfield completions and one of them was the jump ball that is just launched and fingers are crossed that our guy comes down with it, and yesterday we saw that again. The Russell Wilson school of downfield passing.  I don't feel like that is sustainable, but at the same time you have to do Something to make the defense understand they have to defend that downfield throws. Like i said, confused.  I guess I'm going to review the game for myself and look closely at his mechanics and stuff because if he actually fixed that stuff it explains the better throws. And that has been my biggest objection, or what I see as the thing that makes or breaks his chances, that unorthodox dropback and tippy toe action and not having his feet set which limits velocity etc etc. 
    • Manna
      Crazy stat

      By Manna · Posted

      The negative Nancy in me (or objective?) says that they had a bye week to prepare for the Chiefs. However, it’s one thing to have a good plan and it’s another to actually execute it. For all the flack he’s received (from me as well), Bryce seemingly has put his head down and worked his tail off and his play is giving me hope. The first 18-game Bryce showed no progression whatsoever. He gets benched, comes back, and has shown steady progress every week he has started. I think I’m starting to see what the Bryce lovers and unconditional defenders were saying all along, and I hope he can show that on a regular basis for the sake of our QB1 position. 
    • Bear Hands
      Some Thoughts on Our Remaining Games

      By Bear Hands · Posted

      Yeah, we could still very well end up 4-13 with the 2nd pick.   I think LVR has the inside track for 1, with only a JAX team as a team on docket that could be beatable.    
×
×
  • Create New...