The Truth - by SCP

[cptx]

Panthers are my team. That is just the way it is.

I will punch walls on Sunday.

Mope around on Monday

Try to forget on Tuesday

Move on by Wednesday

Start scouting the next opponent on Thursday

Start convincing myself we have a chance to win the game on Friday

Am totally fired up and expect to win on Saturday.

Then repeat.

 

Looks like you spend one more day a week scouting the opponent than the coaches do. want a job?

[Mr. Scot]

Lotta threads on this board start off on one subject and then by some weird happenstance wind up on something entirely different.  I read through and find myself asking "How the hell did it come to this?"

 

I never really ask that question in SCP's threads though.  It just seems to happen kinda naturally.

[Montsta]

And yet you still banged strippers. That's getting poo done right there.

Strippers dig ex-convicts.

That I didn't take the bus was a plus.

[PandaPancake]

The Oxford comma has no place in modern English!

[Happy Panther]

I think it's time to have a little Internet come to Jesus session. Like a herd of fatasses at the Golden Coral when they ring the hot yeast roll bell, it's time to pull up a chair and belly up to the truth. That truth, hard to swallow as it may be, last year was an anomaly during a 3+ year Hurney-cleansing rebuilding process that gave Panther fans false hope. I have talked more poo than most about my Panthers. All the while knowing our faults. I laughed off the pundits negative stories while I knew they were mostly true. I forced myself into some utopian frenzy of false hope that Shula would have an epiphany and Byron Bell would morph into the next Anthony Munoz. I will do it again Sunday morning like a moth to a flame. I will picture the face of that bitchy little QB in Atlanta with his Nancy boy "get off my field" scowl and run into BofA thinking we will win like a dumbass sheep. I used to bang a chick in college that worked at a Western Sizzler in Sylva, NC. Her sole job there was to make green beans. Every fuging day, make green beans. I'd throw her the D in the morning and then I'd get real with her before she got in her shitty Lumina and drove to work at that shithole. The truth was, green beans don't cook themselves. They take time (like 5 minutes). They take ingredients like salt and bacon. She'd always bitch about how much work it took to make 800 lbs of green beans everyday for a bunch of ungrateful mountain folk. Point is, green bean don't just green bean. And like it or not we are in the middle of a rebuild. 2013 was awesome, but you could almost read it on Dave's face after the year when he was up on the podium. He knew we overachieved. This is a long process thanks to some of the dumbest contracts ever handed out by a GM. It sucks but it's the truth. The foundation is in place but the bacon is not going in the green beans until that shitty Lumina gets an oil change.

ImageUploadedByCarolinaHuddle1415753701.345428.jpg

You are all now dumber for reading this.

May be your best one yet. This is basically a Hemingway stream of consciousness.

 

The thing I got out of that was Sylva, NC.

 

Road trip.

[Mr. Scot]

I'll be honest, SCP.  Reading one of your big posts is like talking to a guy with Multiple Personality Disorder and meeting all of him.

[LUUUUUKE]

I think it's time to have a little Internet come to Jesus session. Like a herd of fatasses at the Golden Coral when they ring the hot yeast roll bell, it's time to pull up a chair and belly up to the truth. That truth, hard to swallow as it may be, last year was an anomaly during a 3+ year Hurney-cleansing rebuilding process that gave Panther fans false hope. I have talked more poo than most about my Panthers. All the while knowing our faults. I laughed off the pundits negative stories while I knew they were mostly true. I forced myself into some utopian frenzy of false hope that Shula would have an epiphany and Byron Bell would morph into the next Anthony Munoz. I will do it again Sunday morning like a moth to a flame. I will picture the face of that bitchy little QB in Atlanta with his Nancy boy "get off my field" scowl and run into BofA thinking we will win like a dumbass sheep. I used to bang a chick in college that worked at a Western Sizzler in Sylva, NC. Her sole job there was to make green beans. Every fuging day, make green beans. I'd throw her the D in the morning and then I'd get real with her before she got in her shitty Lumina and drove to work at that shithole. The truth was, green beans don't cook themselves. They take time (like 5 minutes). They take ingredients like salt and bacon. She'd always bitch about how much work it took to make 800 lbs of green beans everyday for a bunch of ungrateful mountain folk. Point is, green bean don't just green bean. And like it or not we are in the middle of a rebuild. 2013 was awesome, but you could almost read it on Dave's face after the year when he was up on the podium. He knew we overachieved. This is a long process thanks to some of the dumbest contracts ever handed out by a GM. It sucks but it's the truth. The foundation is in place but the bacon is not going in the green beans until that shitty Lumina gets an oil change.

ImageUploadedByCarolinaHuddle1415753701.345428.jpg

You are all now dumber for reading this.

Anybody else writes something like this, they'd get flamed into oblivion. Bravo to you Sir, for finding your niche and being the only one here that can get away with it.

[Semaj]

HAHAHAHAHA  "I forced myself into some utopian frenzy of false hope that Shula would have an epiphany and Byron Bell would morph into the next Anthony Munoz."   That is a great line.  You actually used the name Byron Bell in the same sentence as Anthony Munoz.  I didn't think it was possible that I would ever see them mentioned together IN THE SAME SENTENCE.  By the way, one of my Dad's accounts as a sales rep was Anthony Munoz brother out in L.A.  I wonder what kinda shape Anthony is in right now.  He has to be an upgrade to Bell and Chandler, even though his natural position was center and he is 56 friggin years old.  Hey, what do we got to lose?  I heard he was a great teammate and would be good for the locker room too.

[Future of the Funchise]

I'm sitting here at the bar laughing my ass off then I look up to see the highlights from last nights game. My laughter quickly turned to tears.

[SCP]

I'll be honest, SCP. Reading one of your big posts is like talking to a guy with Multiple Personality Disorder and meeting all of him.

17 years in outside sales helps one develop flexible personalities.

[Mr. Scot]

17 years in outside sales helps one develop flexible personalities.

 

I could see that.

 

[Yaboychris28]

Tips fedora to SCP

[DaveThePanther2008]

I think it's time to have a little Internet come to Jesus session. Like a herd of fatasses at the Golden Coral when they ring the hot yeast roll bell, it's time to pull up a chair and belly up to the truth. That truth, hard to swallow as it may be, last year was an anomaly during a 3+ year Hurney-cleansing rebuilding process that gave Panther fans false hope. I have talked more poo than most about my Panthers. All the while knowing our faults. I laughed off the pundits negative stories while I knew they were mostly true. I forced myself into some utopian frenzy of false hope that Shula would have an epiphany and Byron Bell would morph into the next Anthony Munoz. I will do it again Sunday morning like a moth to a flame. I will picture the face of that bitchy little QB in Atlanta with his Nancy boy "get off my field" scowl and run into BofA thinking we will win like a dumbass sheep. I used to bang a chick in college that worked at a Western Sizzler in Sylva, NC. Her sole job there was to make green beans. Every fuging day, make green beans. I'd throw her the D in the morning and then I'd get real with her before she got in her shitty Lumina and drove to work at that shithole. The truth was, green beans don't cook themselves. They take time (like 5 minutes). They take ingredients like salt and bacon. She'd always bitch about how much work it took to make 800 lbs of green beans everyday for a bunch of ungrateful mountain folk. Point is, green bean don't just green bean. And like it or not we are in the middle of a rebuild. 2013 was awesome, but you could almost read it on Dave's face after the year when he was up on the podium. He knew we overachieved. This is a long process thanks to some of the dumbest contracts ever handed out by a GM. It sucks but it's the truth. The foundation is in place but the bacon is not going in the green beans until that shitty Lumina gets an oil change.

ImageUploadedByCarolinaHuddle1415753701.345428.jpg

You are all now dumber for reading this.

 

Probably the worst thing that could have happened.  He hit a HR on just about every free agent and did well in the draft. 

 

Kind of reminds me of the 2013 Chris Davis vs 2014 Chris Davis.  (Baltimore Oriole Slugger)  Dude jumped out of his skin and hit 50 some odd home runs in 2013.  2014 it was nearly half that.  Same guy just did it differently in 2013.

 

While I agree DG has a plan to get us out of this hell there still needs to be some changes.   Preferably SHULA.

 

[R0CKnR0LLA]

i'd like some green beans with extra bacon and hold the green beans